??? When I first met her at the bar, she told me she was 23. After I bought her 3 shots of tequila, she told me she was really only 21. When we went back to my house, she said she was really only 19. She's still sleeping next to me butt naked. I'm afraid if she opens her mouth again I could be looking at 10 years.
Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
Whatever. We're stealing a penguin. Your not allowed near him... You did this to yourself.
I just made doing the dishes into a drinking game. crafty, or pathetic?
Just think of all the blizzard sex people are having right now
we fucked while standing on a ladder. challenging, but worth it.
Idk how hard you fucked her, but you managed to leave permanent ass prints on my tempurpedic mattress.
On a side note I think I burnt my eyebrow when we "teter-totered" into the fire
Aren't you proud to know somebody who texts you "manifold facade" while dumping frozen colada mix into a blender of rum
He was just lying in his underwear like a present. I had to unwrap it.
nana can keg stand better than me. should i be proud?
I was walking out the front door and heard his roomate say "It looks like you need a chiropractor." I think my work here is done.
just like fucking own it. stare that cop in the eye and just keep masturbating "yeah motherfucker Im high as shit and this feels great"
You are the epitome of what awesome would taste like.
everytime he speaks i want to fuck him less. i just wanna tell him to shut up and take his pants off and we could both be happy.
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