Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
Where is the hickey?
i wish that i had sketchier friends so that it would be easier to get drugs
Just had sex in the basement of the library... I knew I was paying $120,000 for something more than a law degree
There's a level of bonding between people at the liquor store at 10:30 in the morning that's unrivaled
As long as you don't die I'm in full support of your drinking decisions
It's very clear that i'm the girl sweating out four lokos at 2 in the afternoon at the gym
I guess I puked all over my hand too and I just looked at my roommate and said, "fix this."
Just went through campus. In the span of 2 min I saw 4 places I've had sex. And thats just down one street. Man do I miss college.
She said to bring taco sauce. Hoping that's a euphemism.
I hate cuddling. I also hate when people breathe. Which he did, a lot. So he can go to hell.
OMG. Dad just threw a 100 dollar bill down on the table for a girl to lift her shirt. I think he was kidding, but...
I've covered myself in body paint in the likeness of R2D2 and I still didn't get laid. Please explain.
Yeah everywhere i go i feel like a 3rd or 5th or (2n+1)th wheel. That's right, i'm a mathematically depressed drunk.
Going back to our hometown to help Gramma move. Thinking we should see if we can fuck on the desk of the homophobic coach who first introduced us while in town.
Randomize
