Buhtt sex?
do u usually make out with people before telling them your name???
he nicknamed his dick "too big to fail"
So..I walked into his bathroom and found a bong and a blender in the shower.....normal?
Sorry for making you give strangers a ride for hits of acid.
4pm update. Theres smashed cake inside my duffel bag, a vodka bottle in the dish drainer, and the most productive thing ive done is make 40 pigs in a blanket
Well be careful man. Be careful. Wear shoes in the house. Safety. Safety first, then teamwork.
You just kept yelling and saying, "IM NOT GOING TO STOP YELLING UNTIL YOU TAKE THAT SHOT"
Apparently I blacked out and started wrestling with some dude last night. Just found out I might have dislocated his shoulder. Best part: he still wants to bone me
He yelled "HOO-ah!" like Al Pacino when he pulled down his pants. Trust me, he has every right to.
pls come tAke this super bath no romo it's just. so nice.
Alcohol won't break your heart. I mean, unless it's all gone maybe
Why do I know about what dicks have been in your mouth but didn't know you had a dog? What kind of friends are we??
I gave him a hand job in the parking lot... now he thinks we're meant for each other...
Hypothetical question: Would it be wrong to tell the annoying children who don't listen to their parents that the motel is haunted?
Randomize
