I just met the 30 percent of the population with an STD
i think the date started going downhill when i mentioned how many therapists i have
Well, of course, to the untrained eye I look like a slut.
apparently i was just sitting there with my shirt down holding my boobs saying "its ok. its all gonna be ok"
Go ahead. I tried to back up ur budhism story but she mite be catching on
Dammit. I hoped that would work. Just tell her I'm doing my pilgrmidge to Nepal or something.
in case you blackout.. this is confirmation that yes, you were sitting spread eagle on the kitchen floor chugging pickle juice out of the jar.
I just don't know what he sees in my vagina...and that scares me.
I love you more than champagne and correct grammar
just pleasured myself to USA hockey beating Russia in the shoot out. god bless America.
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
He met a girl at a stop light and managed to give her his number while driving down the highway.
I came home with 30lbs of BBQ last night. I can't pick up women in a bar but I sure can pick up leftovers from a corporate party.
Can't be considered a walk of shame if you pick up donuts on the way home
I was just told that I'm the Sherlock Holmes of drunken sex. I'll take it.
Yeah that was post sex. I was thinking in my mind, no wonder he didnt ask me to call him daddy since he actually is a dad
Randomize
