dont seek real advice from me tonight cause its always gonna end with we should have sex
Maybe you should go over there and lead him on and reach down his pants like he's about to get some and yank his balls.
That's the best idea I've heard all day.
she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
Its like the two hemispheres of my brain are in a death match but are two evenly matched for either side to win kinda drunk.
I'm a busy girl. All I wanted was noncommittal sex a few times a week
He was trying to hotbox the banana suit. Of course we traded him for vodka.
I'm going to fake an anxiety attack to get to the front of the line. Save me some brisket.
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
I consider any night I don't make out with someone a bad night. So I've been great.
Nothing like the soothing screaming of your neighbor getting boned while eating a pizza on the front porch.
Almost stopped showering halfway through to go get food
He just said "I know you want my cock" and I said nah. I want food bro
I would just like to say that I had morning sex today to the Hamilton soundtrack. So.
He went down on me for like 30 min and honestly half the time I thought about those videos where people can smash watermelons with their legs and I just wanted to do that to his skull
It's a combination of amazing uncoordination, bad luck, and sheer determination to cause destruction wherever I go.
Randomize
