the condom got lost in my hair
I thought at least he would want to exchange numbers after he tried to put it in my bum
Ok just saw a girl open a pillbox, dump it out on her notebook and count out 13 adderall tabs and put them in a baggie and leave. Oh hey college.
Just made a makeshift menthol by rolling a listerine strip into a regular cigarette... Poor? Who, me?
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Puked in my laptop case in the middle of my nutrition class.
You SHOULD feel empty, we were at the top of our game, and by that i mean snorting things we don't understand and only a few steps away from adultery.
And he was super vague about his life, it was frustrating. I totally boned a homeless guy, didn't I?
drunk. just smoked a spliff with a 19yr old hungarian bike taxi driver and bonded over the difficulties of getting weed in a different country. idk y shit like this isnt in the study abroad info packets
Yes, he did use his cock to direct traffic from my 3rd story window. That's why I love him
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Good because ass is like 60% of my diet now
My philosophy professor just told the class that he is suspicious of dolphins. The stoner in front of me totally gets it. I need to start getting high for this class.
That dude with the beard walked up to me, turned my water into wine with everclear and kool-aid, and walked away. Pretty sure drunk Jesus is back.
Either of you know why the shower was on and the bathroom door wide open with no one in there at 6 in the morning?
his ex girlfriend sent him a pic of her naked in the bathtub so I sent her a pic of me sucking his dick
Never has jello made me angry to the point of drinking. But here I am.