I ride home in a shopping cart. Don't at like you aren't jealous.
you know what sucks? talking to chicks you dont want to have sex with
He adopted an old drug sniffing dog so that he won't lose his weed around the house anymore. It works.\n
he sent me a picture of his dick with a heart border around it
searching my car for your cum before I have to give my grandma a ride to the airport. Thanks for this
She had the hiccups when she was giving me head. It was actually pretty awesome
Yknow what, if there is a thug life for white bitches, I'm living it. I went out on a date, watched howls moving castle with my brother till he passed out, then went and got some a+ dick, and made it home in time to take my mom to work. Now its 7am, I'm in bed with some free tacos, and when I'm done eating I'm going to sleep. What a great night.
All I've done this weekend is cum and drink. I think it's safe to say I'm dehydrated.
Exactly best part of my night he took of his shirt and surprise traveler fanny pack
Tried to shave my legs but the rug burn on my knees from last night got in the way.
can i get licensed in dentistry online like a priest
I blacked out. Broke into their house. Took a shit, and left. This is why you can't leave me unattended.
she said a prayer for the pipe you broke. she did the sign of the cross and everything
I have filthy fantasies involving his tongue. My vagina almost exploded while he was licking that ice cream cone.
Apparently during my blackout I walked over to Troy, grabbed my crotch, and said “Eat Fresh” while his GF was with him. FML
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