I'm going to save the lime from my McDonald's salad to use in my Corona later tonight.
spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
The smartest thing I've heard Obama do is call Kayne West a jackass
anyone who says 'i love you' and then followed by 'im going to call the cops if you touch me' doesnt really mean the first part fyi
you tried to arm wrestle for the title of "mom's favorite son"
Robbie told me you spent 10 mins discussing the curl in his hair and that you said "with that curl in your hair, you'll go far"
They gave me a glowstick necklace to wear so they could locate me if I wandered off into the woods
And this is the part where I need you not to judge me. Remember that I have never seen a penis do that and that I have a weird sexual curiosity
Well still if someone cared enough about u to wish an unwanted child or a disease on u ..u must have been doing something right
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
I didnt finish. My brain kept playing the duck tales theme thru the entire blow job
You came out of your room naked under your open robe with a mouth full of brownie on a stick and grabbed a fistful of fruit loops and shoved them into your already full mouth.
He didn't even get to the first chorus of Hotel California before he started convulsing on top of me.
I just smoked weed out of a tomahawk, then chased an armadillo with said tomahawk, I love my life.
You drank whiskey for 9 hours and did not eat anything.Nothing good was going to come from that.
Randomize
