please tell me I'm in your upstairs bedroom. Just google mapped myself and I have no idea where I am.
dude. late night with jimmy fallon isnt even funny. the people in the audience there to see him dont even think hes funny.
kinda like you and your friends.
He sent me a video of himself jacking off. I am not kidding.
WTF??? Isn't he married??
Yeah but his wife is at a birthday party and I guess he's bored. LOL
I hope you shit your pants in a socially devastating situation.
found an empty one..2nd door on the right...i'm already naked.
He thinks MY vagina is tight. That's saying something.
YOU SUCK AT REPLYING IM IRRESPOSNIBLY DRUNK WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING WITH YOU LIFE. celebrate the magicness with me.
The woman in the hospital bed next to me just got diagnosed with flea bites on her vag.
Whaaaaaat? No way.
Now a discussion of pigs vs. dog as carrier.
It's midsummers eve. A.k.a. come over so we can get drunk and wear leaf crowns
Cause I'll toss Tabasco sauce in his eyes and yell "Cobra attack" and walk away
Rough day
Good thing I've started drinking again
Listen, I bought the coke that got us those free drinks, okay? Show some respect.
well, you know. whores of a feather.
we are currently pregaming for our walk to the liquor store.
step one: admitting you have a problem. complete.
I can't decide if I miss drinking or you, they are so closely connected.
Randomize
