At a sweet 16. cant remember what shirt im wearing byt dnt worry im not sleeping w/ the guy who serves the chicken nuggets again
I was so drunk last night i ate cereal with a fork.
too bad they don't have a 'people you may be able to do' thing on facebook. it would save me a lot of fucking time.
I realized it was a bad idea when I broke my collar bone
I saw you eating fruit and doing shots off people passed out
We need to reprogram your vagina to say "no"
HELP! How do I get paint off the dog?
This feeling I'm having... is it love or a combination of alcoholism and unprotected rough sex
that almost beats the chick I saw smoking a joint while uni-cycling past my house at 4am. Almost.
I touched the butt once. 'Twas an experience with the greatness of legend. So I touched it once more.
Well at least I will forever be known as the girl he ate out on the lifeguard stand while people walked by. On the first date.
Strip club, what strip club did I eat a steak at? That's the appropriate question
Like he was trying to be sexy but he had shit taste in porn so i left
i have two papers due tomorrow. contemplating if i should take adderall in my anus for full effects
So in hindsight, going through the McDonald's drive thru plastered at 4 a.m. on stolen bikes was a bad idea.
Randomize
