i want you now
you need to stop dating girls with the same name as your mother...or stop drinking so much...I don't want to see this
She told me that she had to rub her face against me because she was part cat.
After you took the handle off the bathroom door I had to coach the Scottish guy sitting on the toilet, throwing up in his own lap, how to put his pants back on. Yes, I think he won the drinking game.
my brother walked in while we were fucking, silently took my bong from my closet, saluted us and walked out.
Hey we met at the bar a week ago. Your friend gave me a rose and you asked about my nipples.
Driving a mountain pass in the middle of a blizzard with the worst vodka gummybear hangover ever is gods way of telling me to keep the black-outing within a 15 mile radius to my house.
scream really loud. we think you crawled under the deck
Trumps. I've been wiping my ass with fast food napkins for 3 days.
Let's just say he sent me a picture of his dick and I was more impressed with the collection of video games he had in the background...
She had a tattoo on her pelvis that said "it's cock-o-clock" an had clocks and hot dogs exploding away from it. I'd like to tell you it was deal breaker buuuuuuut.......
So we came to a decision, you need to fuck your hot roommate and send us pictures. We voted, so don't hate the democracy this great country stands for
You can't do wine Netflix and blow jobs in the bed you've had since 5th grade with your parents downstairs
I'm wandering around outside asking things if they are god
Bill says he deeply regrets the incident with the soda bottle
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize
