Everything we own is covered in grass and KY
the liability waiver did not state that i couldn't bring my bottle of wine in the bouncy castle. it did Not.
grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
Omg. There's def a kid, like 10 years old, sitting in a buggy at wal mart holding a sign that reads "I can't behave"
please don't let me die tonight
what have you done for me lately?
Ok cuz s'mores night just turned into pina colada after noon and it will be mas fun
If I had your job the next day id be on the news. And not the good news. Like fox & friends. Nancy grace would have my ass.
I also made him write a nonfiction romance novel about what happened and to give it to me when the time was right
He handed me a beer to drink as he went down on me. I want to keep him
You wanna know what I want to eat? Questionable Mexican food before I go drink. Makes for excitement. Will I puke it up or shit my pants
That's so awful of me. Instead of comforting her I masturbated in front of my ex-boyfriend.
mate iv just woke up in the garden. either help me inside or bring out my vodka
Are you going to regret this?
No I do t think so
Ok then he can enter the holy dorm temple.
I mean there are real risks associated with having unprotected sex, but I don’t think I need to worry about a ghost possessing me and having unprotected sex while using my body
I Projectile vomited a massive question mark on Brent's bedroom wall. Don't tell him it was me. I want him to play the whodunit game.
Randomize
