you ate skittles off the table like a hungry hungry hippo. it was awesome.
after last night, i judge her for not breaking up with me
I need to stop drinking. Side note- we have a party bus tonight. So the drinking will have to end after that
No it was after you showed us his fraternaty letters shaven out of your pubes
Beer Popsicles are better in theory
I feel like I've been drunk all of June. And I am in NO WAY ashamed about it.
ATTN: We are officially 15 weeks from our annual "Get-Mega-Stoned-and-BBQ" event. Start saving up the proper supplies. That is all.
He told me that if I were a guy he'd go gay for me. Honestly don't know how to take that.
The hot tub didn't work. But it's okay because we discovered just how many people you can fit in a bathtub.
Will give head in exchange for a Netflix password. Serious inquiries only please.
NO HOOKUPS IN THE CAR. I will try as i might to practice what i preach, but there are no guarantees.
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
Bumble is fuckin insane here. I'm going to break a hip.
Dude you were so wasted you thought a fake electric candle was real and tried to light your cig with it. Multiple times.
I'm not saying you're stupid, just that you have bad luck when thinking...
Randomize
