Just saw a midget shotgun a coors light
this is amzing! feels like my body is having sex with its surroundings!
Having an 'SDSU Mom' sticker is just like say 'Hi, my daughter has an std"
its a sex-hate relationship...no love involved
Woke up today to the sound of church bells. My first thought was shit the apocalypse, but then I remembered my hook up lives next to a church. This might be a rough day.
I BIT YOU IN THE DINING ROOM. I bit you and you crunched
I'm gonna do some tripping... In the direction of balls
There should be a rule. If your dick is under 6 inches, you are not allowed to dress as Thor.
We can just chill or day drink or smoke or watch law and order marathon or play just dance 4 or watch a movie or go to the movies or play hide and seek or hug, so many options
The doctor that gave me my std test is trying to hook me up with her daughter lol
Can't a white girl just get drunk on a Sunday night and eat rice crispy treats. SHIT
When my mom found out he was a high school drop out she was like "seriously? Can we raise the bar a little higher next time kels?" So my moms pretty cool
I spent most of my night in the men's room eating popcorn on the garbage can conversing with strangers pissing
Bitch got stabbed in the eye. With a fork. Wait for it... At church. I was the only one at a party interested in her story. Only in the south
Your amazing boobs made me fall in love with boobs. I never cared about boobs you should be proud
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