I never doubt that you might be drinking at any moment.
there are too many children here to make this hangover-friendly
If she's telling you consent laws theres probably a reason
What a whore. She reminds me of that asian guy who can eat all the hotdogs.
Please know that I fully expect you to help me steal a bed if I have a bad breakup.
they bet me shots that I couldn't give people piggyback rides around the club just cause I'm 125lbs and a girl...I had a line forming after the third guy.
Definitely Got caught hugging a strangers tree last night with 5 others.
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
Alright. I will breast feed the first person to get here.
he had me stop mid-blow job to make me use my phone to id a song on the radio..
i wasnt really sure how to responde to that.
Can we please get through at least one night out when you DON'T threaten to have sex with one of my parents?!?!
Yeah I figured you were blackout when you were Shakira dancing on the floor.
In honor of Sarah Palin's bday I suggest we watch Nailing Palin
Everyone in Columbus is two degrees of separation from my vagina.
we promised ourselves we wouldn't get too drunk, and what happens? I wake up the next morning with half a mcdouble in one pocket and some barbie clothes in the other.
Randomize
