Looks like an M-80 went off in a lb. of pastrami
Journey is playing on the radio....I think it is a sign I am going to pass my drug test
ed mcmahon, farrah fawcett, and michael jackson all in one week. What next god, are you juts gonna take my penis too?
I was high enough to think chocolate sauce on bagel bites was a good idea
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the only human I can compare her to is rosie o'donnell.
I dont think he stole the pillow. I mean if he wanted a souvenir, my thong was on the nightstand.
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
i was just offered a 40 day sex challenge. prepare for the best 40 days of your life.
oh. my. god. yes.
You are the only one who would stop a bum, tell him to open up, then pour straight vodka in his mouth. You made his year.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Everybody knows the last week of summer internships include showing up to the office hammered and hitting on the CEO
If I had 3 wishes one would for sure be a designated driver for life that gives hand jobs.
I ended up in th ER yelling my height weight and age
We are literally scheduling phone sex... if that's not long distance af then i don't know what is
Well when you come back we can have a huge bitch fit...or get really drunk....whichever comes first
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
Randomize