I woke up this morning in a strange bed with a kid with an accent playing with my feet.
i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
just saw my sister at the strip club... dont think she's "taking a night class over the summer"
I sharted during my first quiz and I couldn't leave, I went ahead and took the rest of the day off.
i just know my balls have never hurt this bad before
i just called corporate taco bell to ask about the life span of a chicken burrito.
it was such a weird mix, KFC and penis
BTW, it's bullshit to say that not doing a shot is unpatriotic. You know how I fall for that.
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
She makes walking on a treadmill look like a porno. I wish I could send over shots as an ice breaker.
That's effing brilliant. We should start a business.
He shoved his balls through an egg carton and showed us a picture. They were surprisingly egg-like.
Time is so short and I miss you. (I just watched that commercial where the people all laugh and get older and die.)
Is it weird that I'm looking up pubic hairstyles?
I think he's an actor
That's not a good enough reason to wear guy-liner
You ruined the universe
Randomize
