this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
Fucking Canada. At least when they wake up tomorrow they're still in Canada
Within 5 minutes of max walking in his pants were off and he was wearing my snow goggles as underwear.
She refused to give me a hand job while we were watching a war movie saying she didn't wanna disrespect the soldiers
Shaun got a portable breathalyzer for christmas so now we can tell who the biggest pussy is at the end of the night.
he told me not to treat him like a child and then started peeing off the trampoline
Her hair goes down to her lower back and nobody was there to held it back for her. She looked like chewbacca dipped in vomit.
Blackout me just wants to pee on sober me's dreams. Literally.
I just accidentally hit share on pornhub... Probably the scariest moment of my life
I just Miyagied my roommate through her first set of tit pics. Her fuck buddy owes me.
I just drove my booty call to his booty call, if that isn't spreading the love, I don't know what is.
I know what I want to do this Friday. However, it might end in me getting kicked out of an arcade and a mini golf course.
When the bouncer wouldn't let you back in you screamed "Authority is not given you to deny the return of the king!" and ran past him.
I knew how high you were when you put a french fry in your mouth and said 'fuck, this tastes like meat but feels blue.'
You walked into the frat house and screamed "whose down to fuck" i think they were more intimidated than anything
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