Just had to open a tuna can with a spoon. Gave me a sense of hunting for my own food.
yeah. and then it was like the room of requirement. the elevator just opened for our threesome.
IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
Thanks for stranding me with th douchebag award recipients
We went into lab today and when no one was looking i touched our cadaver's penis!
I just got a flashback from Saturday night of you helping me wash my feet in the bar's bathroom.
Blew a line and having a jolly rancher... the day is looking up.
I pissed myself at the bar so I threw away my wet underwear and kept partying... you act you've never done that before
I left for five minutes and Chris wound up half in women's clothes, half naked. And the naked half was covered in shamrock stickers.
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
I'll be the Broncos and you be the Seahawks and you can pound the shit out of me.
He said he could outsmoke me so I challenged him to a weed duel. I don't always very competitive but when I do...
The hair on my legs is officially flapping in the breeze when I walk. I must say, being single does have perks and this is one of them.
I took the pregnancy test for shits and giggles, but neither shits nor giggles were had.
I'm just going to take a nap and hope I wake up more attractive.
Randomize