I'm the only one here who isn't hooking up, coming out of the closet, or crying because of one of those 2 things.
You're only the seventh guy she's ever kissed. Somesones gunna get EPICALLY stalked
Omg. Get me out of here. Someone is playing michelle branch.
her face looked like how i feel after Taco Bell
We have sex, then we talk about foreign policy. Its a win-win.
There are bruises on the top of my foot. The pole won.
I feel like I took a shit on my life and you're rubbing my nose in it.
Well... When your girlfriend fucks your sister, the 2 week courtesy window goes out the door.
In honor of Sarah Palin's bday I suggest we watch Nailing Palin
Mostly i might never get belligerent again because im gonna have to keep track of a diamond ring.
Anddon't worry about me I have my Darth Vader flashlight
Did you put Dave Matthews band on the playlist? It's really hard to funnel when "Crash Into Me" kicks in.
At this point it's more of an experiment to see how much actual bush growth is possible. See, being single can be both educational and surprisingly comfy!
Are you opposed to me trying out your penis?
Wanna go on a picnic?
... by picnic I mean wanna sit on a blanket and drink with me?
Randomize
