i'm eating jello out of a teacup with a fork. awesome?
she said she could "feel the heat of my groin" against her. ruined the whole fucking moment.
she won't take no for an answer... no matter what language i said it in
We're having the conversation about what happened last night, all we can come up with is that we came home, drank two litres of lemonade, I took one of her seizure pills and we fell asleep with sabrina the teenage witch on
He has a clip art-style heart tattooed on his hip. I hated him way before I saw his tiny dick.
How much is that going to cost?
A lot of beer.
Bad things happen to those who bang their lab partner at the beginning of the semester.
Day drinking straight vodka out of a Mountain Dew can being towed behind a kayak on a raft. And no, there is no time difference, it really is 10 am.
There are so many things that would come back to haunt me if I ran for President someday.
like that video of you mad stoned vomiting in the bdubs parking lot after going to a pizza buffet screaming how you needed to make room for froyo
Wat
I get a nose bleed and my uncle is automatically giving me the "your doing lines off dashboards again aren't you" look
Time to eat Mexican food til I hate myself.
That's completely alright, I do it a lot.
I saw a kitty kat get finger blasted on the couch by a Bulls player
I put his pb&j sandwich in my bra and never looked back
I'm still hammered too. I started tweeting the time at one point I'm pretty sure.
I didn't have any choice but to cuddle you. Your hair was stuck on my nipple piercing.
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