So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
And to think..we used to do everything sober...
Had a farmer come into my class to talk to us today. He apparently met his wife on fb and just thanked jesus for his land. I think I am in the wrong major...
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
The doctor asked me what height I fell from to hurt my back.. I answered keg height
you know, this Evan Williams whiskey isn't so bad when it's watered down a bit and you're home by yourself on a Saturday listening to Snoop Dog alone in your apartment without pants or any plans for your future...
Think I just saw your homeless guy on High Street. Did you give him back his crutch?
You shouted "FUCK SHANIA TWAIN" and then downed an Aquafina bottle of white wine none of us knew how to react
What if we made a bunch of weed butter and then poured the butter into tiny rectangular molds and then chilled it so it was solid again and then wrapped it with the tin foil wrapping from restaurant butter and then left them at restaurants and wreaked utter havoc.
I've shit my pants 4 times in 12 hours... Never trust a fart when u pass 30
OMG IM A TIGER AND I LOVE ROARING
"I'm gonna wax that ass" was the successful pick up line used on me last night. Clearly I had a few too many cause it worked..
You thought you were drunk? I woke up at 6 o'clock this morning with a cheeseburger in my left hand a drink in my right with my window half way down. it was raining.... fml
dude, i just accidentally flashed your mom. BIG TIME.
Thank you for holding my butt in a non-sexual manner when its cold. I appreciate you and your warm hands.
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