She walked in the room and sighed really loudly fishing for attention. but I didn't bite cuz I don't give a fuck what's wrong with her.
I just woke up my dad to tell him that i made out with the drummer. He wasnt as excited as I was.
i bet even starving children in Africa take the crust off their poptarts
there's something wrong with the internet when a search for "barney the dinosaur violence" comes up with nothing
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Everytime I walk into a bathroom at school that I've taken a pregnancy test in I get a little bit nostalgic....
we used the bottom of a tampon for coke since no one had a 20 on them. My life has resisted to this.
just got the results back. i love his dick even more now i know its clean
i wondered why i had so many splinters in my hand, then i went out to my car and remembered id stolen an entire cactus
I'm going to start referring to my liver is Livy. I feel like if I give it an affectionate nickname it will hate me less. Livy isn't ready for syllabus week.
I think we all know your liver needs a man's name.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have three different pairs of earrings at three different houses including your 16 year old brothers nightstand. Look at my life. Look at my choices
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
Please let me buy the coffee, all my assets are in starbucks gift cards
What's the rule for getting in fights with homeless men in suits?
Here's a rule: don't
I can't. I mean he's hot, but there's really nothing else there
You just said he's hot
NO YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND
No no no, I want to share him with you. Think of it as me sharing a piece of delicious pie with you. He was THAT GOOD.
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