tweet Hawks Win!! tweet
That's how twitter works, right?
I convinced her san diego was a state. all the proof I needed was saying, why do they call it san diego state university?
So while she was giving me a lap dance I told her I quit med school. Just so she didn't feel like the only one who's made bad decisions in their life.
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
I've hooked up with three guys in my accounting class. I'm beginning to think my teacher failed me so I can start getting laid again.
Yeah I think we tried to use the shower curtain as a parachute because its tied to my backpack with some string. Dont know if anyone actually attempted it though.
You left a trail of sequins from your dress incase we got lost
You came in as I got off work, ordered us jack and cokes. Put them on my tab, and then proceeded to fall asleep on the bar.
I need to get a life, I am either crying at every glee episode or just wanting to blow rails off photos of us
My dads not up on pop culture but he's not dumb enough to believe your 2 girls 1 cup reference at dinner was from the bible.
You rubbed your penis on my leg and said "people have paid for this kind of action"
He asked me if I wanted to play "Edouard Mandevan," turns out that's French for Edward Winehands
The amount of drugs I did this weekend make me concerned about my health but at the same time fascinated to see if I could do more
We helped him hit the bowl to the point that he didn't even have to move
He signed my ass with a Waffle House pen.
Randomize
