How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
so I just used the H1N1 mask my mom gave me for college to hold in a bong hit longer... god I love orientation week
He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
no seriously, she's legit pissed i'm late to lunch because i was watching full house. there's obviously no future here.
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
She just asked me if I was looser "in the vagina" than her. While gyrating.
I doubt she'll sponsor it. You know alcohol and fireworks don't mix, right?
It's okay. We're not going to soak the fireworks in alcohol. The alcohol is for drinking.
my make-up looks really good tonight. I swear it had nothing to do with me finishing all of your strawberry vodka.
Not saying puking on the side of a cab was how I imagined freshman year of med school but...
We compared her boobs to bacon. I'm probably going to have to justify that.
I was proudly and successfully the first girl ever to get kicked out of a the bar for being too drunk last night. Loving spring break.
It was like 10 tiny penises being shoved in my vagina.
Do the right thing and go fuck yourself off a cliff
Fun. You missed it. Michael broke a door with his erection.
Last thing I remember I was riding on a picnic table being hauled around by a lawn mower with an empty case of bud light on my head...
Randomize