very cute, but more "I wanna put you in my pocket and keep you as a pet" and less "please bang me" type of cute.
I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
She has a t-rex face on a stuart little body.
then she said "on the count of three I think we should apologize to eachother"
I've never been so happy to start my period. I'm gonna let everyone in the store see me buying tampons.
11am puke and rally. THIS is what I'm gonna miss about college.
he let me duct tape his mouth because i said it was my fetish, i really just wanted him to shut up
He's having a heart to heart coversation with the keg about what he should do with his life.
Dude your not gonna get by security covered in blood wearing only a robe
Don't worry I'm drunk they won't say anything
I NEED TO GET TO THE PLAYGROUND. I JUST NEED TO SWING. IF I SWING MAYBE THE SMELL WILL COME OFF OF ME. I NEED TO SWING
She carried my bag of puke down the aisle and the flight attendant wouldn't move the beverage cart so she put the puke bag in the flight attendant's face and said "I have a bag of sickness!" I've never seen a cart move that fast.
I'm hoping the sedatives kick in before I drunkenly decide to eat this whole cheesecake.
Can I get my morals surgically removed?
I have two choices: tits or tacos. I just can't decide.
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
Randomize
