I'm fucking your sister right now.
You motherfucker
She's next.
So I decided to put different foods on my dick to see which would feel the best
and??
Cake is only good when you eat it
I looked at my arm when I woke up..I guess after 8 tally marks I said fuck it and wrote "too much"
I wrote and sealed my mom's mothers day card last night while intoxicated.. should i put it in the maibox
without a question
I'm now in all their contact lists as "Pee-Pee Hands"...
the campus cop used the word depravity in our citation.
Mike is so stoned. I just heard him quietly mutter to himself "rock a piss" as he walked down the hall to the bathroom
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
There's a black statue of liberty dancing on the side of the road. Please hold while I join him.
Are you two whores ready for me to turn the light on so you can see what you came home with last night?
It's titled "A countdown to death. A psychological look at the downward spiral of actress Lindsay Lohan and her inevitable Hollywood demise" This dissertation is genius. Not a single sober moment for either Lindsay or myself. Good stuff!
He is indeed a crazy mutha fucka. But mark my words. MARK MY WORDS. My job has placed me at the same party as Tom Cruise. I. Am. Fucking. The. Crazy. Out. Of . That. Alien . Fucker.
I think pretend fucking a camel is a good thing to do downtown. They loved me.
The George Foreman grill is melted. I don't know what other problems could arise.
Just let me suck your dick and be happy. Let me have this.
Randomize
