I just woke up in the back of his van. Bring me a sunkist.
Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
Why did that cocktail waitress get to sleep with Tiger for 2 years, and all I ever got for living in Whorelando for five years is a couple of pictures with Joey Fatone
woke up with a used condom shoved in my ear. i officially hate alcohol.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my feelings for you are synonymous with those of a grizzly bear and salmon. i don't want to nom on you; but i need you to survive
He's the kind you'd bring home and you'd wake up and all your food would be half eaten on the kitchen floor and all your socks would be missing.
They're tearing apart the house I lost my virginity in:(
I just talked this guy out of hooking up with me and gave him relationship advice. Am I a good person now?
My horseshoe mustache feels at home at this bar.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's official. I'm gonna fuck hot art class guy. But this won't be like hot Samsung guy. I'm gonna make sure I follow through this time.
Yes dating, but it seems easier to just live in a perpetual state of Netflix, internet porn, and cheese.
was I atleast graceful when I feel down that flight of stairs and broke my hand?
Doing shots with my high school valedictorian. Bucket list
drunk me always erases text conversations because she is a woman of mystery and does not like for me to know what's going on in her life
I just sold Adderall to a priest, im not quite sure how I feel about this situation
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