I just realized that when I walk away people probably say "wow she really has a drinking problem" and sadly it doesn't bother me.
Is it a bad that I spent my 5 year anniversary with my husband texting my ex boyfriend?
He just asked me if his big had a curved penis. Awkward? I think so.
dude so we were eating nacho cheese popcorn and chasing it with cole slaw
by the way nacho cheese popcorn is me making popcorn and then adding milk butter and mac n cheese mix
Saturday at 4 is jello wrestling sponsored by the senior class council. That's why my school is awesome. Boom.
I've been trying to brush my teeth for 20 mins now... Mother of hangovers.
It was disgusting, and I would've rather licked the condensation off the windows instead, but I figured that's wasn't very ladylike
I asked if he wanted to sext and he just started sending me pictures of his beard.
he said he needs a little more pabst, some time to jack off and a sandwich and he'll be ready
WHY ARE THERE SO MANY BURPS IN MY SMALL, INCREDIBLY ATTRACTIVE BODY
he had DANDRUFF in his PUBES. 0/10 would not blow again.
What started out as a one night stand ended in him texting me the next day, saying he thought he was gay.
You had sex with a Scottish dude with a peg leg....how could I NOT tell that story??
1 why did you tell them where i peed last night and 2 where the fuck are you
Well, we went shopping. He bought me starbucks and ate me out in the change room at target. If that isnt the best post covid first date, I don't know what is
Randomize
