the sex was "jacking off to playboy" bad.
you were leaning against the vending machine asking if there was a shower you could puke in.
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
Don't blame me. I told you I didn't know if I had a key to those hancuffs.
Things are very odd on my 29th hour of being awake. Thought there was a bird in my lecture hall and it was just a girl putting up her hair. What even
sometimes when you're high at work you just have to say fuck it and eat the dog treats
Even dream me is a champ at smoking weed
Our host-mom was rubbing her back sympathetically going "muy bien, chica" while she puked on the beach. So yeah, I think we got the best one.
I woke up on my girls floor with a pound of muenster cheese in my shirt pocket
I felt like I was having sex with Joffrey from Game of Thrones. Needless to say how bad it was
My blue shorts are now brown from all the stripper fake tan
Why are your pants in the freezer?
he’s basically the devil with a fuck boy hair cut and chlamydia
The neighbors in the apartment above us are at it again. The roleplay this time is cop and prostitute. I give it 30 minutes, you? Already sounds better than the last one
Haha word. Sure I can do that. Help me find which bar has my pants and you'll get free tacos all week
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