Trust me, I wear more condoms than socks. I wouldn't risk infecting my cock. It's my livelyhood.
Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
Wish you were here....
And I wish your mouth was around my cock, but that never happens, does it?
i just drank the rest of the vodka . Btw why did we put candy corn in it?
as she was beating the hell out of his ex, she screamed prison rules, and smashed her head with a beer bottle. I'm oddly afraid yet so attracted to her now.
i'm about to say screw it and get drunk in the hotel by myself
It's 2 pm, at least sit by the pool...
Can we please get on skype for like 20 seconds so i can show you my penis and the spiderman temporary tattoo that is right above it
I learn from experience and I experienced what it would be like to completely lose my mind and then wake up with a stab wound.
He handed me a beer to drink as he went down on me. I want to keep him
I'm drunk enough to know I'm texting you and sober enough to know what I'm saying to you
Wake up. Eat bread. Find your dignity. Don't be late for work again.
I just licked a piece of cheese off my phone screen if that makes you feel any better
Are there rules against fucking your ex's dealer?
Woke up to find my underwear in my purse to only remember I took them off at the airport
Look don't ask questions just know that one thing led to another and I have a shot glass stuck in my ass. I need your help!!!
Randomize
