I dont think that drinking by ourselves on a saturday night counts as being "fun alcoholics"
Last night I dreamed I was having gay sex in prison. That's the last time we go to theme night at the club.
Ironically her ferret's toys look like her sex toys.....this is a whole new level of kinky for me
you can SEE the outline of a pad through her jeans. there is no way
Thank you as well. My penis is starting a slow-clap right now.
hes out at the street wearing a tophat and a monocole and carrying a cane and greeting every car that drives by
he just went across the street and into someones house and we could hear him inviting them over from the front porch
STOP LICKING HIS MUSTACHE
You woke me up at 2 am to tell me I could pee in a golf club if I wanted to.
you look like you're about to get down on your knees and give america the business.
All I want is to get as high as I did that time I started hallucinating that my brother was becoming a monkey and I saw my mum on every surface of your room.
It's seriously like a finger. But it's a cock. I don't know what to do. I feel like I fuck him to be polite.
...and that's why girls with IBS don't paint their nails
My general physician told me i have the emotional capacity of a 2 year old, While he refilled my xanax prescription. That's service!
I'm at that point in my life where keeping an extra pair of underwear in my purse is normal.
How is it possible for someone who gets so many dick picks sent to her, to be experiencing such a complete and utter lack of dick IRL.
Randomize
