I think the recipie for awesome sauce is butter and semen
One reason I don't come to Portland. I saw 8 guys I have had sex with last night. At the same party.
By 8 I mean 9.
And by 9 I mean 10.
Found a cheerleading trophy in my shower this morning. Explain.
I elbow dropped a bag of ice to break it so we could make margaritas. I bled everywhere. Be proud.
I think I should advise against you hooking up with a guy that throws "the shocker" up in all of his pictures on facebook. Just sayin.
Well I went on a freakin rampage and destroyed a fan and claimed that it wasn't doing its fan duties... Then I knocked on everybody's doors in the hall and asked if they were content with their fan's performance and if not I would take care of it...
His cuteness will no longer contol my vagina
I was more than drunk as hell I have rug burn on my elbows from ninja roles on the ground..
I can't say "baby i'm to high to talk to you" in Starbucks.
She showed up in lingerie and a turtle backpack full of bacardi. I think its love.
Strip Simon Says: DO IT
I can't tell if my roommate is crying or having sex and the fact that there's anime in the background is only making this more confusing
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
How don't you remember..? You were getting handfuls of skittles out from our bra screaming TASTE THE RAINBOW.
My boss is paying me to come clean his house in a maid outfit and told me not to tell anyone....this is shady as fuck but I need the money
Randomize
