are you so shy because you have an std?
You just kept yelling "SATAN!" at me every time I walked by
I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public.
she cried into her fur with two handfuls of money- she was the physical manifestation of white girl problems
It feels kinda weird thanking you for sucking my dick, but I just don't know what else to do right now
just saw sorostitutes streaking near the university president's house. thank you tequila day
We've given up. My vagina is tired of constant lonely nights and disappointments. This is our retirement.
Hah I guess I sent that to like ten people, along with another one of me sitting in a bath tub eating an ice cream sandwich.
I'm on my way back with the wine... And a puppy. It was free.
someone needs to name a hurricane after you
we watched a porno and made a drinking game out of it. best first date ever.
I wish you could just Google "people I've had sex with" and they would all just come up
He fucked me while wearing his night time breathing machine mask. Does this mean I joined the dark side and he is Darth Vader?
No fucking Jell-O shots or meth. Those are the rules
There's something about a foam party that makes freshman want to turn their lives into full blown shit shows. And I'm ok with the fact I am one of those.
Randomize
