WHY CAN'T YOU EVER SHIT LIKE A NORMAL PERSON, JESSE.
I think he was having a seizure but nobody knew because 'what is love' was playing
Is it weird that I miss finding cum in my bed?
everytime she opens her mouth i wish that i was deaf
i just ate an entire onion plain. all alone. i have never felt more single in my life
She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
Tonights theme there is the 7 deadly sins. Greed, envy, sloth, gluttony, sluttiness, fellatio and vodka.
Today's dinner table topic: the probablity of my dad turning gay if he ever left my mom.
They left me stranded on the side of the road with a table and five gallons of water. They said it was all I really needed to survive. People are staring
True idk how my parents didn't know I was blackout. I ate like 4 pieces of cheesecake and showed my cousins my boobs
Why am I getting texts saying are you ready for this butthole? Help
he gave me a flinstones gummy vitamin and was like, "ya know.. because of ebola."
Rage-masturbating and then crying myself to sleep. Welcome to Wednesday.
I'm fucking camped out by the bathrooms. I think the poopatrator is in there. Wtf is my life
Almost an end to the saga.
Been using bowl smoking as a method of time for so long I don't know how long it actually takes to get to work
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