The bar is filled with bros right now. Sucks I had to pay $5 to find that out.
i want to give my vagina back to god and say no thank you
You've ruined blow jobs for me. You were the motzart of sucking dick, where every other girl is like awkward elevator music
it's kind of slutty but what the hell, so are we
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
nothing says "we're all in this together" like the herpes she passed around to our entire group of friends
I walked home with an awkward asain couple. There was a language barrier but I think we're friends now.
Trust me at the end of the night there will be queso smothered places you didn't think it could be smothered
Breaking up as roommates was a poor life decision. I'm sorry. Thank you for never shitting on the floor.
So that's all you want from me. Easy ass.
And an everlasting friendship
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can measure my amount of vomit in solo cups.
Your dick is going to fall off. Be careful or you'll get callouses. A workingman's dick.
I know I've become a responsible adult because this time, I'm not going to do the drugs I found on the ground
The date went significantly better after the fifth shot of fireball.
I'm not sure what happened. There's a frozen waffle in the floor and he's walking around with a curtain rod and making planes out of bread slices...
I WANNA... wait, will you kinkshame me?
Nah.
I WANNA KNOW WHAT HE SMELLS LIKE
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