why didn't you poke me back
Going to Kmart high is like jumping in a time machine back to the 80s
This is so stupid. Now I have to call the party planner and tell her that the break up party is off. They decided to get back together.
how did i get to the car and why are my shoes broken
Not only have I fallen off the wagon, it ran me over and just kept going...
When Pony by ginuwine plays I pretty much just grind on the nearest penis.
The "don't have sex with him again" alerts you set on my phone just started going off.
Good. "Seriously, don't do it" should start in about five minutes.
Do you think it's wrong for me to hop on that dick before he realizes that he's gay?
You have better ratings than Crest. Only 4/5 dentists recommend it. You have 8/9 recommendation for your blowjob skills.
Also at one point I told him to say my name and it took him like 5 seconds to remember.
I know you like got hit by a car but do you want to come to my birthday pardi
So I'm at early voting and the group of ladies behind me is talking about voting no on 2 and my gummy is kicking in, thank lawd
she crossed my comfort zone...i thought i was a freak
said the guy with a pink sex swing...
You threw him in the dryer?
He went in of his own accord. Mumbled something about experiencing the blossoming of popcorn.
Just saw Little Red Riding Hood riding a guy on hood of a car
Good for her for committing to the costume
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