if you are receiving this text, you are one of the people i hate
Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
She went from zero to smokin in five shots
i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You can't date a girl from every country.
I'm the captain planet of women
Maybe my heart is located in my vagina
I woke up with the new contact "Britney Both Nipples Pierced"... how do you think the night went?
i've never smoked before...when you said wake and bake i thought you meant like a funeral bbq or something
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The security guard popped his head over the mens room door and goes "nice tits- now get out." Deer in headlights moment right there.
Not after That Night. No. I hate tequila. And it hates me. Very mutual hateship going on.
Thanks for your faith in my ability to stay sober while writing final essays. It's...unearned.
I may have just masturbated while on hold with the IRS. don't judge me
I'm just hoping that with all the times he's puked in my yard a mushroom field might grow.
I remember her making the first martini but the rest of the weekend is a blur of vodka, high heels and sex toys.
First time being used by a cougar. Definitely okay with it
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