I didn't think it was possible for the human body to be physically dependant on weed until I moved in with this kid
I almost punched the night nurse in her face. I woke up and she was standing over me.
i guess when we were done i grunted "unforgiveable" and walked out.
Hahaha alright after 5 shots I'm not allowed to touch glass or boys with girlfriends.
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Is it bad to get into the ocean at night? i always thought sharks hated the smell of vomit after drinking
Please tell me that's his leg and you didn't really just send me a picture of your dog's dick
Vaginas creep me out. I'm disgusted by the look of them. I wonder if this is what having an ugly baby is like: you have to take care of it and love it but it just hurts you on the inside to look at it.
I know this is really fun but I don't wanna glow anymore
Shitshow foam night was such a success
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Yea. I feel great. My life is great. My job isn't as shitty. And my daddy loves me. I love strip clubs. Great self esteem boost.
I woke up and my backpack was empty. He used me for sex, and back to school supplies.
wtf I can't believe that bar tender told on me to my mom
Hey! Happy Birthday! Could you do me a favor and bring my underwear to the bar?
I smell like heartbreak.
Tequila and sloppy rebound sex?
How did you know?
Okay, but that still doesn't explain all the glitter in my puke.
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