someone is gonna have my baby tonight. they just dont know it yet
I'll alert the authorities
Odds of those being real?
One in who gives a fuck
He told her hed rather go bobbing for apples in puke than have sex with her.
Ok, it's starting to sound like someone's out there trying to learn to play the trombone while breaking kitchenware.
Opted for cash back rather than the 10% extra I'd get for store credit, solely for drinks tonight.
You're lovely.
Are we at that point yet where I can just say "I want you to sit on my face"? If not, want to go out for "drinks"?
Can I just go to one establishment in which I haven't banged anyone ?
Do you know anyone else that comes home with unexplainable injuries as many nights a week as we do?
Mischief managed.
YOU ARE NOT A MARAUDER, WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO NOW?
Dude, they hit that lizard part of my brain that tells me to fuck people.
Preach sister.
I know. I know. He'll be weekday dick.
I've scurried myself in your trunk come find me in the morning
If you wanna fuck the pudding, fuck the pudding. Just not the chocolate, Im gonna eat that.
I think my liver just tried to kill me, we need to slow down
If you left your bike out in front, I just watched some dude steal it.
Randomize
