Like worst hickies ever he always gives them like wtf
I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
so I have this game called 14 beers left. and we both have to drink 7 before we leave
yea pretty sure we followed the trail of your spaghetti-o vomit to find the car
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i regret nothing . he quoted dr. suess . he deserved that bj .
When I told her that her boyfriend was making out with another chick, all she said was "which one"
Listening to Ke$ha's new single to pump myself up for my STD test.
if the furniture in my bedroom wasn't shape shifting... this would be a different story.
No foreplay. Missionary. Too quick. And he owns a fedora.
I almost fell asleep reading that.
I almost fell asleep fucking it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like Jeremy snapchattong while we're fucking is a perfect example of our generation..
i woke up at 4 pm face down on my hardwood living room floor. i would say its a new low but i think I found my new napping spot
She left you responsible for her guinea pig for what, 3 hours? And it somehow died under your care? I will no longer trust you with so much as a beer.
Well. I had to explain to my niece that the word cunt is not an abbreviation for country. I'm the best aunt in the world.
I put miralax in my rum/coke. Go hard or go home.
I hate when pretentious people talk bad ab corn dogs
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