hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
We were doing it doggy style, and I puked on the floor and started crying, he told me it was okay his cat would eat it... and if it would make me feel better we could do anal...
And they lived happily ever after....
I wish there was a non-hangover washing machine that I could stick myself in right now
at least he lost his v-card with a bang... or should i say the clap.
We had to put his head at the bottom of the driveway so the puke would run down. Now he's sleeping outside.
Fuck. These are the symptoms I had when I was pregnant. This could be bad.
his grandma walked in on us. twice. and he was truly fucking surprised when i put my pants back on.
i just woke up reverse cowgirl on my couch. fully clothed. my laptop is on the floor sideways. blasting gay porn and lady gaga. pizza crust everywhere. goodmorning.
It just hurt to pee because he was fingering for fucking gold in there.
Beautiful fucking linguistics Shakespeare, but youre still not doing that to my face
Well he's a 33 year old furniture salesman that picked up at 19 year old buying a bedroom set for her room. I can see how that would be awkward
I didn't think four grown drunk men could cuddle on a twin size bed, but we found a way.
I'm not gay but if a lesbian wants to eat my box out I'm not gonna say no to someone who knows what they're doing.
all I remember the next morning was crawling through the doggy door and finding my underwear in my purse
I woke up handcuffed to a bed wearing nothing but an army belt. Does this count as thanking our country?
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