she said i have a nice penis, i told her only bob saget and god could judge that.
I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
He kept saying that the puke outside the theater wasn't his and it was all a set up to keep him from partying with the whores. Then he passed out on the sidewalk.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i was way too optimistic last night... got back to my apartment and the porch light was still on, like i'd actually make it all the way home.
Screw it. I'll show up in a white dress with a sign that says " I fucked the groom and it wasn't that great."
She's the perfect storm when it comes to psycho stalkers
Just got done fucking the squirter chick. She came when we were in a 69. I now know what it's like to be water boarded.
I wish my head, heart, dick, and nose could just agree on something for once
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
As I'm trying to leave her house she shushes me and puts my hand on her boob, then goes back to sleep. In like 30seconds. What the fuck.
You may want to re-read your sent texts from last night. You were texting me about your "fire shits" spelled 6 different ways between 3 and 5:30 AM.
At this point, if I'm not getting fucked by a man in ONLY cowboy boots, it's not worth it.
Nothing says summer like lemonaid, but nothing says fuck yeah summer like lemonaid and vodkavodka
My only contacts are booty calls or the club hockey team.
I don't know what you slipped me, but my TV is vomming blood right now. Thanks, jerkoff.
Randomize