in the car goin home for fam dinner and he is silent... i think he realized how big of a whore his little sister is
Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
Judging by the fact that my hair was glued to my head with vomit, yeah I think I couldve used a friend last night
i feel like words won't express my appreciation properly so at some point i'm just going to bring you pizza then go down on you for an hour. fair?
i told my boss i want to eat her tits. 90 percent sure i'm getting fired
after last night my drinking related hospital bracelet collection is up to 13
You just said we could build a blanket and pillow "fuck fort." Of course I'm never leaving you.
Someone got day drunk, but I'm not saying who.
It was me.
Is it socially acceptable to stop at the strip club for the lunch buffet on my way to the airport?
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
He can't just hit it and quit it and then eat your pop tarts on his way out.
So I should just walk in, look him in the eye and say, "I just came to fuck your brother, nice to meet you" and just walk to your room.
Anytime he goes down on me i automatically think of you cheering me on. Your a good friend.
Shit. My boss is having me meet and greet with the new doc upstairs. Do you think his doctor powers will detect that I'm still high?
Is it weird that I shop for lingerie by thinking if it will look good on both me and your floor?
No. Not at all.
Randomize
