is it possible for your nipples to fall off? if so mine might. they hurt so bad...
well after this past weeked you can expect to see me on maury playing a little game called "who's the father"
To put it in a frame of reference with which you're familiar, it was like making out with a golden retriever.
This is now the friendly bartender typing for him. He wants to be on you. He is going to "destroy your vagina". Good luck and sorry if this woke you up!
High water is the most godliest tasting water in the world.
We should hook up after this. Laugh or look horrified to say yes.
Pretty sure I sang "What Makes You Beautiful" to some random guy in a parking lot last night...
I think I'm too tall to 69 successfully.
I think I might cry.
You just kept screaming "PLEASE YELL CORNDOG AT HIM. PLEASE. CORNDOG."
That all sounds beautiful. All I have to offer is my shining personality, extensive amounts of space knowledge, and I hear I am pretty not sucky at sucking dick
I'm pretty sure the Bible says "He who is most sober may cast the first stone."
And god said thou shalt never deny free booze. And it was good.
I may have passed out and puked all over the host's favorite couch, but three hours and a rip later, I was eating tiramisu in the bathtub with the birthday boy and a hot Italian.
FUCK ME I smuggled weed onto a plane by accident
My boob job is like a master key that gets me in any door, any party and anyone’s pants! They’re magical!
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