i will never coherently bang her
Is it creepy to message a girl and say you had me at stocked liquor cabinet?
she said 'i love fried rice', threw a condom at me and passed out naked.
Is there a word for someone who only has sex with NFL prospects?
In between when I last wrote and now have screwed a Swiss guy on a hostel bathroom floor. Okay, real life?
im like basted in vodka, i went tanning and it was like i was an alcoholic turkey being cooked in a locker of doom
I don't miss having sex with him. We had our finale fuck last week. He's all yours now.
I'm turning twenty & the only honorable way to exit my teens is by slapping the fuck outta the bag. You better be in.
Just check with her if girls can get blown, that's all.
I just wanna inform you guys that the first pregnancy scare of 2016 is over...
We knew it was an interesting night when we found my thong wrapped around a chocolate chip muffin in the fridge.
He just said "I know you want my cock" and I said nah. I want food bro
HIS DICK IS GLORIOUS AND I WANT TO RIDE IT TO VALHALLA
On a scale of 1-10, how inappropriate is it to sneak into someone's box of sex toys and put googly eyes on their vibrator?
Why would you keep yourself in a sharting situation
Randomize
