Unintentionally made him cum in his own mouth, and he just sat there screaming..
i think he just broke into a bike shop his last text said something about hiding in some tree
Oh nbd. She just had sex with a divorcee. On a charter bus. At 10 a.m. On a Thursday.
We stuck the straw in the bourbon as a joke, you saw it as a challenge.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude she gave you head while I was in the closet, we've passed the "awkward" phase.
I rode a bull tonight, There is absolutely no reason my dick is not in some chicks mouth
Well that's the first time I've woken up with wet jorts
We're already drunk. 4 hours to go still. And there's a bear advisory. TOP WEEKEND.
By the taste of his semen he isnt vegetarian and therefore lied to me to take me home on a brighter note i stole his fondue set
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fell asleep with Kristen and woke up with Sarah. It's official, vacation has begun.
Like he and the nurses kept being so persistent with it and I just wanted to run out of there in my backless gown and yell FUCK OFF BITCHES IM OUT
For what it's worth, I didn't think that hitting you with a crowbar as hard as I did would break your arm like that. You should drink more milk.
Kids I used to babysit are now fuckable members of my social media periphery.. Getting old sucks
It's days like today that make me happy I'm not a porn star.
He sent me a text saying his breakfast today was leftover mead and some fruit salad
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