yeah. then i thought it would be a good idea to show them how hairy my armpits were, so they'd be distracted from the bush in my pants. EPIC FAIL.
even in my darkest moments, having another person eat my jizz would make me smile
PS, you're not being slutty, you're "making dreams true."
Real friends wouldn't let me shotgun a 4loko after already seeing me trying to eat a girl out through her jeans.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
ONE NIGHT STAND. You have 27 minutes before the offer expires, so I suggest you hurry.
i wish it would rain vodka just once. i have not puked yet bring it on
These days, you and me are swimming in dicks.
Marco
Polo
I CRIED after phone sex. Am I gay?
Should I have spent my entire pay check on Crown Royal and LSD? No. Do I regret it? Also, no.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She said she was hoping I'd be hotter. I told her I didn't see anybody standing in line to titty fuck her either. She was a great kisser.
Drake has all the answers
Jesus Christ. Even your cock has to be an overachiever. :-(
I cannot take an uber back in my costume...can you please come get me?
like I'd leave you in a situation like that..pfft. what kinda friend do you think I am?
...a stoned one.
He set the tone in the back of his car by blasting Marvin Gaye's sexual healing before railing me
Randomize