defrosting a beer in the microwave. no sparks so far.
I think he just gave me the 'I used to sleep with your sister' discount
Update: I only have one shoe. The other one now belongs to the gods of jello-wrestling. May it rest in peace.
Well... He is a good looking man underneath all the fat and muff.
hot buttered vodka was not a success. on any level.
He was dressed up as Jesus and had vodka in one hand while he was blessing everyone and splashing them with holy water in the bathroom.
Remember that mom/daughter stripper team? Well i just met the ex husband/father in AA. WOW!!!! WOW....
I know we said we never would. But try fucking a fat guy. He put in so much more effort and then made me waffles.
I forgot that places existed where drinking on Sunday is frowned upon. It's just so unreasonable.
Something about the fact that I could do coke off her ass cheeks just speaks to me
Just fell off my bed trying to pose and take a nude for you. Probably broke my wrist
Riddle me this: I can stream porn just fine but try and watch my college class and nooo it won't work
Be there in 4 minutes
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
Did you poop on the roof?
WTH?
Is that a no?
he told me he wanted me to go see his cat. apparently i was more interested in playing with his cat then having sex.
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