Am I the only person who thinks Megan Fox looks totally like a Thai lady boy with a serious tanning bed fix?
Just turned elections for the sorority into a drinking game. Right on.
as nice as a boyfriend sounds, a relationship would require morals and self-restraint - both fields in which i lack.
momma always taught us never to change for a boy..
I don't remember him, but he's saved in my phone as "uh oh zbt"
Do you think she will like "you don't have to swallow this time" gift certificates for Xmas?
You told me to remind you that the bruise on your ass is from when you danced on the table at Ziggy's, saw a cop and tried to 'fly away'.
They're fucking on the bed next to me. I took adderall and smoked so there's no fucking help for me.
Is being in jail an excusable absence?
Normally, it will inspire me to work. Today, it's inspiring me to masturbate.
Do you think I can get away with quoting Work Bitch by Britney Spears in my speech?
Okay so it turns out that my bf keeps a log of every time I sleep-fart. It's dated back to 2013.
Good for you, kid with a beer in hand as you walk to your 11 am class.
I thought this was a dry campus.
That means you have to bring your own beer from home.
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
...this is why fuck buddies should be only for grownups.
I can't be a daydrinker without you. It just doesn't work.
I love you too.
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